Monday, March 11, 2013

my birth story!!!



I had fully intended to go completely natural. I wanted soft lights, my partner and family there with minimal distractions. I wanted to labor in the shower, feeling the pain slip away as the water pelted my skin. I wanted to use an alternative birthing position rather than just laying on the bed. Nothing but the end result of meeting my daughter went as planned.
I was having contractions for more than 3 days straight, strong long lasting contractions that the Dr on call at the hospital wasnt taking seriously. I was in the hospital twice and each time sent home because though I was progressing they said I had to progress a cm an hr to be counted as being in labor. I was apparently just dehydrated. Finally I was told that I would be induced on Monday at 6 am non chemically via the breaking of my water by a Dr I actually liked called Dr Ogburn. I saw a light at the end of the tunnel. I was 40+3 and beyond ready. From the beginning I was told I wouldn’t make it to my duedate and now I was 3 days past it, depressed, in pain and over the entire experience. I never knew that just 1 week post partum I would miss it so much that I would cry to my hubby about it. It’s still very emotional for me.
The night before the induction hubby and I walked around various stores in the area together.My contractions were pretty strong but knowing they wouldn’t do anything because of my induction the following day, we just kept active. We cooked dinner and relaxed, watched netflix and tried to make it an early night. At 6am, one week ago on March 4th 2013 we were admitted into the hospital and taken to the labor room. We settled in and called my Nana, mom, and sister who is 13 months my junior. We had had our bags packed for weeks waiting and it was surreal that by the time we left the hospital, we would never be alone again. We would be bringing our daughter :) A nurse named Shenay put in my IV. First in my right hand then tried again in my left forearm by my tattoo of the 5 birds. Marian, a German nurse who was a bit older took some more of Michael and my stats then focused on fluids.
At 7:53 am my water was broken my Dr Ogburn. I was 5cm, 70% effaced. 20 minutes after the breaking of my water, I got my first contraction of the day. It was 5 minutes long, intense and I felt okay. I was more excited than anything else! Michael was sweet and supportive and was fully on board with going natural. He held my hand or stroked my hair when the contraction came and several times, he kissed my forehead. I love when he does that.
Michael, for some back story, was always very supportive and loving during the pregnancy. His view of me and my body never changed the whole time. He welcomed the appearance of the bump, longed to feel her kick and move and fell in love when we found out its a girl. The last month was hard because he wanted to meet her so badly. It depressed him because work was hard and the waiting post duedate and with all of the supposed false starts, he was drained.
My family arrived some time around 10 I believe and they sat in front of the bed like a birth audience. My mother, though we were never close and I held a lot of childhood resentment toward was supportive during the pregnancy as were my grandparents and some friends. The contractions got progressively worse/better and I remember turning down the heat in my room to about 60 degrees and everyone was freezing, even my grizzly bear of a hubby I have. At 8cm I was sobbing because of the pain, I couldn’t breathe, my sister started crying and that’s when Michael said that it was okay if I needed the epidural. I felt like a failure but my hubby kept telling me that its our first, I had never known actual pain other than my tattoos and piercings, and no matter what, Madison would be safe. I progressed from 7cm quickly and I felt a little better after the epidural had worked. By 2:30 pm I was complete and I was able to push. My sister had wanted to watch her be born but it got too much for her. I knew it would be knowing her personality so everyone left to go the waiting room, Dr Ogburn reappeared and we began to push. I felt the pressure but my epidural made my legs heavy and hot. Michael held one of my legs and another nurse held my other leg. I kept trying positions to push in. Sitting up, lying back…I was so uncomfortable. My contractions began to slow and I felt so upset. A nurse named Amanda directed my pushes and I was told she kept stabbing down into my vaginal wall with her fingernails. Michael was so happy to see her coming and I got a mirror so I could see her head. The lights were off most of my labor and delivery and I was so happy about that. I was calm and relaxed but a little snippy at times because of my pain pre-epidural.
I pushed for an hr and 20 minutes and at 3:40pm, on March 4th, 2013 Madison Marie McKenzie Prestis was born weighing 6lbs, 13 ozs, 20 1/4 inches long. Michael cried when she was born and despite his germaphobia which has proved difficult postpartum, he kissed her vernix covered head. Lots of thick dark hair, long legs and arms and her pointy pixie ears….we were so in love. I got an hr of skin to skin and my family were allowed in.
Things I remember only in pieces:
I only had a poptart for breakfast so I was starving. All I wanted was an Oreo mcflurry and a sweet tea from McDonald’s.
My hubby rubbed my calf during my contractions pre-epi. I kept calling it my thigh.
I had a second degree tear that was sewn up by Dr Ogburn who was educating a surgical student. I don’t mind being a teaching experience. My tear was not perinial however and it was a rip in my lower vaginal wall. Michael is convinced its because of the nurse Amanda. -_-
My recovery has been hard especially the first few days. I was sobbing every time I would pee and showering was extremely painful. I was so swollen.
I believe I suffered from baby blues, not post partum depression.
Madison has the perfect latch and she is a very very very aggressive feeder.
One nurse said to me ‘not to sound weird but you have perfect nipples for breastfeeding’. Her name was Caitlin.
I wasn’t allowed to cosleep but we did anyway.
I got 45 minutes of sleep my whole hospital stay and couldn’t use my butt donut because it all hurt too bad.
I can only sit in certain types of chairs, I can sometimes pee comfortably.
Michael didn’t sleep at all for 4 days.
Madison has her father’s eyes and hair but my nose and lips.
She lost a little weight in the hospital. She dropped to 6lbs, 7ozs.
She has chubby cheeks now and is very sassy. She does what Michael calls ‘Leonard Nimoy eyebrows’
I have postpartum swelling in my lower body.
I’m struggling with my belly. But its getting a lot better.
Michael still rubs my belly and it makes me cry because he would pet Madison all the time.
They wouldn’t let Michael stand during my epidural because a lot of men faint.
Her cord stump fell off at 4 days old.
Michael cries because he hates how much of a germaphobe he is and because he thought Madison doesn’t like him. He gets depressed and feels hopeless.
She would not sleep in the bassinet in the hospital, hates all things that go over her head and can sleep through anything. Madison hates to sleep.
A nurse named Lori who checked my swelling actually made it worse.
A nurse named tiffany tried to take Madison to the nursery so we could ‘get some sleep and not have to deal with her crying’
The hospital photographer took the worst photos of my daughter because she was rough removing her onesie and it scared Madi.
Madison cluster fed her first 24-36hrs of life.
Michael changed all of her diapers in the hospital except when she pooped the last day.
Madison was called advanced from day 1. :)
She has very strong suction when she latches.
I loved my LC Amber because she was open to AP and was still ebf-ing her 19 month old
Madison is an observer. She has always loved looking around.
My family was there everyday we were in the hospital even though my mom lives 2 hrs away and my nana is an hr away.

I don’t think I can remember anymore. If you have any question or things to say, email me: erickaaphillips@gmail.com

Friday, March 1, 2013

Today is my due date

Today is my duedate and nothing is happening. I dont know why i believed people when they said there is no way i'd make it to this point. My OB wont let me go past 41 weeks so at my dr appt on March 5th (tuesday) they are going to discuss induction. I do NOT want to be induced. I've tried alot of natural methods to get her to come on her own but nothing seems to be working so I guess I'll just wait. :( I just want my little girl and Michael wants his daughter to come. He says he either wants me in labor tonight or to play white knight chronicles (a video game)...MEN!!!

Thursday, February 28, 2013

pregnancy survey


about you
name?: Ericka
age?: 21
height?: 5’3.5
pre-pregnancy weight?: 145

about the father
name?: michael
age?: 25
height?: 6’2
are you still together?: engaged and living as a married couple

about your pregnancy
when did you find out you were pregnant?: 7/15/12 though he knew basically right when we conceived.
was it planned?: very planned!
what was your first reaction?: i cried and was thrilled because i got 3 positive tests and the test at the dr said i wasnt pregnant. then after 3 days of waiting, they called me and told me i was right and my blood test showed i was pregnant :)
who was with you when you found out?: no one, i went to michael’s work and jumped on him and told him that we were pregnant!
who was the first person you told?: michael
how did your parents react?: worried at first then thrilled because they see how in love we are and how good of a family we are together
how far along are you?: 39+6
what was your first symptom?: sore boobs, nausea, mood swings
what is your due date?: 3/1/13 (tomorrow)
do you know the sex of the baby?: a wittle girl!!
have you picked out names?: madison marie mckenzie prestis
how much weight have you gained?: ick, 30lbs
do you have stretch marks?: yes, unfortunately.
have you felt the baby move?: she used to be a bit more wild
have you heard the heartbeat?: so many times but it never gets old

about the birth
will you keep the baby?: of course
home or hospital birth?: hospital
natural or medicated birth?: natural, unmedicated, non chemical induction methods if necessary
who will be in the delivery room with you?: hubby :)
will you breastfeed?: of course, and plan to ebf
do you think you’ll need a c-section?: definitely not
will you cry when you hold the baby for the first time?: definitely
what’s the first thing you might say to him/her?: how much i love her, im sure
would you let someone videotape the birth?: i might but i probably wont have it taped
are you excited about the birth, or scared?: excited, happy, ready to get this show on the road!!!

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Madison and Fleetwood Mac

Every time I hear this song, these lyrics stick in my mind. I have heard it throughout my pregnancy and I have have realized as i get closer to my due date that even though everyone thought I'd go early, maybe i'll be late. She will do what she wants when she wants, just like her mama. I have finally made peace and i'd be very pleased if she stayed in until Friday, when we're due :) I have tried almost every natural induction method and it hasn't worked so I have to assume she isn't ready. A lot of women have told me that it's because I've carried her well and made her comfortable and I am okay with that statement. I am very pleased with her growth and I am satisfied with the fact that she is now over 7lbs :) She has long legs and arms, a chubby belly, gorgeous big eyes...I just want to see them in person. I do have random contractions, I no longer have a mucus plug and I'm just sort of waiting now.

Come when you can, Madison. The world is waiting to see your pretty face :)

Listen to this gorgeous cover below:

Go Your Own Way

Saturday, February 23, 2013

Something has been bothering me...

I'm annoyed when people tell me i will believe in spanking (or some other thing like CIO etc) and go against my gentle parenting philosophy once Madison gets here and i become a ‘real’ parent. Um, i am a real parent despite not having her here yet. i am in tune with my child, i want to learn how she feels and understand her rather than punishing her for her personality. every child is raised differently and each child is individual but if you treat a child like a person- with respect and not like someone who is smaller and younger than you who couldn’t possibly know a damn thing about life, they would respect you too. I think if you start them out knowing what to expect from you, they wont try to take advantage of you. a child doesn’t set out to be manipulative, they don’t set out to be bad- we as parents are here to guide them, not make them feel like lesser than.

Friday, February 22, 2013

realization...

So this entire pregnancy i've just wanted to meet my daughter, i wanted time to go by faster and i just wanted my end result. Now that i've gotten here with 7 days left, though i refuse a chemical induction because i want to go all natural, i just want my mermaid to stay in. I'm not afraid of the birthing process, kind of nervous to be a first time mama but now that she's so close, i just want time to slow down. Though i do think i could deal without the pelvic pain, the cramping, the back pain....i guess at the end of the day if she wants to bake a little longer, i have to let her go her own way. i cant force induction naturally and i am above trying the castor oil method because its harmful and doesnt sound pleasant in the least.

i love you my little mermaid. when you come out, all we want is for you to be healthy :)

- ericka 

Thursday, February 21, 2013

My first post :) Introduction

This is a picture of my fiance Michael and I on Christmas day. As you can tell the poor thing wasn't feeling that well but he still took the time to love on his baby. That day was incredible and it served as an almost baby shower. We did not have a baby shower as I personally think it is rude to invite people to come to a party with the expectation of bringing gifts of a child they haven't even met yet. Kind of how I feel about having birthday parties. I feel that sometimes they are greedy. Of course our daughter will have birthday parties when she is young but its about the experience for her and not so much the gifts.

As you can tell by now, I am a little different. I am a 21 year old mama to be and I can't wait for our daughter to be born. She is due in 8 days and while I know it is not far away in the least, I can't help but feel impatient. I want her soooo badly. I have tried every natural induction remedy besides castor oil as it cannot possibly be healthy, and we have even tried to convince her how warm it is outside and how much space she'll have so she wont be as cramped as she is now in my belly. Needless to say, the babe is stubborn and remains unconvinced.

I am now a SAHM-to-be, and my fiance whom I will most likely refer to as 'hubby', works full time. We don't have much but we have each other. Like the Beatles said, All You Need Is Love, and that's what I believe. I am in no way naive but I believe we can't always dwell on the negatives. We must concentrate on the the positive things in life because otherwise, we would be a miserable lot.

I little more about us as a little family.

The bird, myself, is a cultural mix for black, italian, german, irish and native american blood raised in a small town in southern ohio by the river. The boy, hubby, is italian, german and french and from just about everywhere. We met at work in January of 2012 and though we haven't known each other long, time means nothing to us and we fell madly in love. He's an intelligent, clever boy of nearly 26 who has a deep love of science fiction, nature (despite have a 'sun allergy'- much to difficult to explain now), music and video gaming. He snores, he's messy, good with money and extremely funny and I wouldnt take him any other way. He too is obsessed with his unborn daughter and is dying for her to get here. The mermaid (our unborn daughter Madison) will be a Pisces like her father while I am a Cancer. WE are a family of water signs so that should be interesting. Like you might have guessed about me is that I'm into astrology but I also like music, tattoos, yoga and other things associated with a 'natural/crunchy' life, fashion, make up and general randomness. We are both nerds so God help this child!!

I think that is enough for this post as it's getting quite long. I dont know who will actually read this but I hope I have at least one reader.

-Ericka

Email me?